The Anti Whatsapp for Conversation Mentality

Recently I was added into a Whatsapp group where people discuss things to do in Geneva as well as more interesting activities a drive from Geneva. I was given admin privilieges on Whatsapp to organise events. In connection to this I shared activity ideas, interesting videos and more related to the topic. Yesterday someone objected to how much I posted so I started a private chat to converse, and when that was done I deleted the post that had triggered him.

That individual then posted about how I had tried to make the disagreement private, rather than public. He went so far as to start stirring up a lynch mob against me with the question “Do you agree that he posts too much?” so I left the group. This is bullying and I will not tolerate it.

In all team management courses, in books and in plenty of other team dynamic manuals they say “if there is a disagreement get a private room and discuss it. I had already deleted the post that triggered him to troll me so to me it was a matter of two or three messages to clarify the situation.

When it became about bullying, and trying to tar and feather me I abandoned that whatsapp group and will ban that person from events I personally organise.This disagreement could have been private, and convivial, rather than open.

The other reason I left the group before it escalated is that I don’t want the admins to have to treat us like misbehaving children. Meetup groups, and group chats are for mature, responsible adults, not childish bickering. When I saw that the disagreement was going to escalate into a flame war I quit. I then told the admin about the problem, matter of fact.

For decades I have been highly active on the social web, as I have blogged about for decades. In a previous climbing group we had huge friendly conversations where a few of us were noisy, but we also took an active part in the group.

In the group that I was part of I already organised two or three events and people enjoyed them and thanked me. In the real world, or physical world, as I prefer to call it, people are kind and considerate. On the web, and whatsapp people troll. They want to fight, rather than share inspiration, ideas and insights. I think that this is a shame.

I have been in Whatsapp and telegram groups, especially Ingress groups, where I thought people post too much, but I didn’t complain. I just mute the group to check messages when I want to participate. It’s easy to do.

To summarise, I think that sharing insights and project ideas is key to a healthy and lively group. When people try to stifle the exchange they hobble the group. The question is now whether to still organise things via that meetup group, without touching the Whatsapp group, or to move on to another group. There are plenty to choose from and I could create my own. It’s a matter of 9 CHF per month. I can easily cover that by driving people to and from activities. If I start a group it will be in April, at the start of the next season, when it’s more worthwhile.